From the desk of Teresa Jordan, Executive Director – Last week marked a milestone in my life that had me reflecting on who I was 25 years ago – where I thought I was headed, what and who was important to me, who I was busy with.
I think the reason we mark the anniversaries of different occasions is perhaps for this sort of thing – looking at how far we have come, marking the passage of time and noticing that perhaps – in looking closely at photos – we have in fact aged. A quick little check in, to notice and appreciate how far we have come, or grown, or achieved or learned.
Here’s the thing – I know what that 22 year old girl in the photographs was thinking, dreaming, wanting and worrying over. I know the plans that she had for her long life and I know where she thought her paths were leading.
“Dear Young Teresa, almost nothing turned out the way you expected. In fact sometimes that path was lost, flooded, turned to loose gravel and shards of glass. At other times it was so surprisingly glorious you could not have dreamed it better. I know that you got mired in disaster and distress lots of times, but you made it through, you were made to do hard things and to find glittery happiness sometime. Love Less-Young, Teresa.”
I guess the thing about all this reflection this – I have realized for all my planning, unexpected things happened. For all of my sleepless nights of worry, unexpected things happened. For all of my times of great sadness, or joy, or excitement or stress, unexpected things happened.
And while I know my nature is to think and plan and worry, if there is any take away from thinking about the anniversary of my first marriage, it is that there is much to be said for trying to stay in the present and be grateful for exactly where you are.
Yes, I tend to think too much, perhaps worry and plan too much. This reflection has been a good exercise for me; it is a reminder that if I could sum up the last 25 years of my journey – with all its joy, sorrow, laughter, love and tom foolery – it would be that most of it was unexpected. Which is exactly as expected, really.