Stepping Out

I went to an annual general meeting this week for an organization that I have supported, and been a member of, for seven years. I was thinking about my own AGMs and how we love our members to attend, and I had the time so I thought I would offer my support.

It was a well-organized meeting, and I was certainly welcomed by the general manager as a member and given a package and voting card. But then not a single soul spoke to me.  

I smiled at people at the coffee line, I took my seat; a person sat on either side of me, but immediately became engrossed in the package and their phones. The meeting began and I even asked a question, which was answered. But upon the conclusion of the meeting the very tight knit board and few members who were clearly former board members began to close ranks and chat about upcoming events.  So, I left.  

And now I can write about the experience of being welcomed but not included, being present but without a valued role, being invited but not being. I think it is important to reflect on the experience – no one at the meeting set out to make me feel less, but they were preoccupied in their own endeavours and probably assumed it was someone else’s role to include me. They had their own thoughts and motivations to deal with, no one is a villain in my story. 

However, this experience can remind all of us how to be hero. Presence is not enough, when looking to include we need to step out of our comfort zone and make some personal connections. I think sometimes we abandon groups and clubs quickly if we first feel as I did, like I was not really wanted. I think it serves both us and others well if we just make a commitment to start a conversation, make a connection, take that moment to welcome the stranger, even if we are the stranger.  Many would offer that as humans we all just want to be seen and be valued.  I am sure that if we commit to this over and over the doors of true inclusion will open for all.  And yes, if I have time I will attend next year, I still love the organization – and there was coffee.  🙂

Photo source: Openverse