Boiling Rocks

In reading about life in the high arctic I stumbled on a story about the darkness in winter, that in the highest regions of the arctic where people live there is almost four months of darkness.  Decades ago, when there was less technology, I read a story where a woman worked in the dark and cold to chop a block of ice to melt for water.  It was only when she had it in the pot that she realized that it was in fact a chunk of rock that she had worked so hard to bring inside.   That seems like a huge mistake to make and all that effort in the cold wasted, but I must admit I think I have done this many times.  If we think about it, how often do we spend heaps of time on something to find that in the end we are boiling rocks.  Modern teachers talk at length about boundaries and about making sure that we are not nurturing relationships that are not meant for us.  I think, though that most of us still do, we hope that if we keep on giving the other person will suddenly realize our worth.  We sometimes think, well if I take on more of the project this time from others, they will see the value of teamwork and pull harder next time.  Or we think, I will just let myself get over busy and exhausted right now and I am sure it will be smoother next time.  All these scenarios and more could be compared to boiling a rock and hoping for drinking water.  The hope in the dark was to find a nice clean hunk of ice that would offer good drinking water.  The work and effort and weight to carry should have resulted in the desired outcome, the mistake then was not one of process, it was that the ice being chipped at wasn’t ice at all.  And sometimes we will not be able to see our mistake right away, and sometimes we will boil the rock for some time before we realize.  Here is my thought, once we can clearly see it’s a rock, lets stop trying to boil it, start over, make different choices, learn, and set some boundaries that will reaffirm our worth.  Its never too late to turn of the heat and start fresh.