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From the desk of Teresa Jordan, Executive Director – I love the dreamers, the big schemes, the passion for trying something new – I love that one man had a dream for the World Championship Soap Hockey and Music Fest in Haliburton.

Let’s take a moment to honour the risk takers. Where would we be without them? Nothing tried, nothing gained. None of the big festivals that now perennially pepper our annual community event calendar would have ever been started if someone had not taken the time to try something, make a poster, book a venue, work out a tour – take a chance. And while, yes, by all measures the event in Haliburton did not draw the thousands of people that were hoped for, it was an event, it was a start.

Events are a gamble and I think everyone has a story in which the crowd that was hoped for never arrived or, on the other side, you were slapping together bologna sandwiches in a back room because people were still arriving to wish Grandma happy birthday and the buffet table was getting low.

So here is to John in Haliburton, to Donna for making our scheme work, to everyone who has put together something to celebrate in a gathering, big or small. It’s all about building community, having fun, making connections, interacting with our fellow citizens on this journey and, usually, food.

Keep ’em coming, and pack extra bologna just in case. One can never predict what will be a huge success – maybe they all are.

I had the pleasure of driving to Haliburton this week in the glorious sunshine. I live on highway 35 and it is being repaved so, over breakfast, I planned an intricate route to 0avoid the construction. It involved driving through Omemee, Downeyville, Dunsford and to Bobcaygeon. I was so confident that the minutes of extra time slowing down in villages would definitely outweigh the time spent in a flag person’s ‘stop-and-go construction world.’

As most people who live in Canada can guess, there was a great flaw in my plan … there was construction in two other places on my well-planned route! First questionable idea, thinking that I could out plan construction, and second, thinking that I could out plan wait times!

Slow downs, waits, traffic clogs, back logs, collaborations that seem to always fall behind, are so much a part of what we do. There is always a surface that needs redoing in the middle of a project that seemed so simple at the start. Best laid plans to change or reroute often end up right back where they started.

But here is the great part – I made it to Haliburton, basically on time. I had a lovely, sunny drive and all was well.

Change work is hard; day-to-day work is hard; cooperative work is hard … but the destination and the view are worth the effort.

Thank you so much for your work from day to day, for your extra effort to plan and for your course adjustments, both well thought out and spontaneous.

From the desk of Teresa Jordan, Executive Director – Parenting “learning moment number 143” for this month alone – you cannot will things to happen.

My son was chatting to me as I was leaving Haliburton the other day and mentioned that his English class was having an exam potluck breakfast. First off, is that not just about the coolest thing you have ever heard of? Secondly, I asked him what he was bringing; he said that all the good stuff was signed up for already so he would probably bring nothing.

Problem-solving-hero-mom leapt into action and stopped at Fenelon to purchase watermelon, granola and some little macaroon things. Proudly, I showed my son the bounty and he replied that all that stuff was already being brought to the breakfast. I sat him down and told him the timeless truth passed on by mothers since time immemorial, “You cannot go to a potluck empty handed.”

In the morning, I checked again and asked my son what he was taking to the breakfast. He quietly indicated the granola and put it in his backpack. End of day, I first asked how his exam went and, second, how did your granola go over? “I forgot to bring it out of my bag” was the answer.

You see, the learning here is that you cannot, by the sheer force of an interac card, a last minute shopping trip and timeless lessons of mealtime ritual, force another human being to do something that they are not willing to do. This story is a great reminder that all we do is model, teach, guide and create experiences. The leap to actually pass around the granola is entirely out of our hands.

From the desk of Teresa Jordan, Executive Director – I sometimes travel a little with this job, and I sometimes travel a lot. In the early years, I invested in quite a robust make-up bag and stocked it with everything I could think of. In the first few years, I added more as the need arose.

Now, seven years into being an Executive Director, I am well covered in the make-up department. Yet every time that I pack to go somewhere, I throw a few things into my suitcase that might not be in the make-up bag – tooth paste, deodorant, whatever I see while packing my clothes. Inevitably, when I get to my destination, everything I need and more is packed in the make-up bag. Why do I not trust that what I need is already there?

Maybe it’s the same when we are faced with a challenge, a new role or tricky situation. We want to scramble for a hairbrush, grab yet another make-up remover, read up, talk to a friend. I think, though, that time has proven again and again that what we need is already packed.

You are learning and growing all of the time. You have skills and insights and experience all tucked away for when you need it – trust that it will be there when you need it; that all you know you will remember; that all of your skills will be at hand when required.

You’ve got this! Your make-up bag is overflowing with the competencies that brought you this far – it will not let you down now.

Thanks for all you do. Unpack and add to your kit each and every day.

From the desk of Teresa Jordan, Executive Director – Our recent Annual General Meeting (AGM) was a barn burner. I am so grateful that so many people stopped by to celebrate our first year. I know we will build on the successes of this year, and next year will be even bigger.

The day after the AGM, Community Living Trent Highlands hosted a training session and afterwards, there were sandwiches left over. A staff member took them to the nearest neighbour connected with our agency so that he could enjoy some free food. He had attended the AGM thought, and so his “not so thrilled” comment was, “Great, sandwiches again.”

I hold sandwiches in high esteem. I think we have learned over and over again that a sandwich and a drink are the ultimate ice breakers, the levelers, the conversation starters, the common link when we want to have a conversation, to learn about each other, to just spend time together. Community centres, churches and all gathering spaces in between understand that between two pieces of bread lies a story, a visit, a connection.

At the training, the comment was made that not taking time to develop a relationship is
like not changing the oil. Sure, you can work, support and engage with someone for a
time without really knowing that person, but it can’t evolve further than that once the engine blows up. I may have messed up that metaphor, but you get what I am saying. Stop, spend time, listen, break bread, have a conversation, develop a relationship and save a colossal engine failure later on. Let’s get excited when we hear “sandwiches again” ~ here comes another opportunity get to know someone.

Thanks for all that you do and for the all of the sandwiches you share.

From the desk of Teresa Jordan, Executive Director – The past Saturday, I had the privilege of thanking the supporters at the Trish’s Wish 12 km Walk-a-thon. This walk began as a one-time thing to support Trish, a high school student, with expenses in her battle with cancer. Trish did not survive but it was her wish to have the walk continued to help others. Now the Foundation of Trish’s Wish raises tens of thousands of dollars each year through several fund raisers, and supports youth in Kawartha Lakes who have medical expenses.

Being at the walk-a-thon with the community volunteers and walkers reminded me of the power of community. It’s not the dignitaries or the agencies – it’s people connected around a cause, connected by the wonderful bright light of an all too short life, connected by the drive to give back, to spread joy and help. This community power exists all over the place, but for this Saturday morning, in a sea of pink (Trish’s favourite colour) it was visible, tangible, and almost electric.

Trish’s Wish has helped many our families who experience barriers to lead a full life. As I said to the crowd, “The Foundation only asks if a young person is being held back from their destiny due to an illness or disability and then gives money to ensure a quality life.”

Here’s to Trish’s legacy, one of passing on the power of the human spirit to help others reach their unique destiny. Here’s to that human race. At the end of the day we are, after all, walking together to bring out the best in each other and our community every day. Here’s to all of you looking out for the magic of community all around – much thanks.

Want to have an argument? Probably you don’t – very few people do – but arguments are the stuff of life as we all try to get on with our day-to-day and all of the tasks and decisions that entails. What I have learned in the last week through training is that not everyone sees the world exactly as I do. I know most of you are thinking, “That is clear, what’s the big deal?” For me, though, the training was a deep dive not only into communication styles, of which there are many (and many people in the room shared a similar style) but also of motivations. Everyone’s motivators were very different, and the training made it very clear to me that we are all very different and consider diverse things as very important.

Arguments are, then, easily explained. Two people or two groups have a different opinion, are motivated by different things that affect their desired outcome and then, sprinkled on top, are different ways of communicating. This creates perfect storm, unless we can pause, take a moment to consider the stormy factors and think a moment on what it might really be like on the other side – what is really different, what could compromise look like, is consensus more important than ‘winning?’ And, finally, are my motivators getting in the way of really seeing the core of the issue, and can I flex to communicate in a way that is more compatible with how the other person communicates?

This is all a lot to think about when you are very mad or very passionate, but how significantly could it change our day-to-day interactions? I think it is worth a try. After all, if everyone thought exactly the same way, this would be one boring existence of mundane, “hi how are you?” Calm waters all the time never made a skilled sailor savvy in navigating the storms.

Thanks for all you do in storm and calm.

From the desk of Teresa Jordan, Executive Director – When I was nineteen, I stopped to get gas and managed to scrape the side of the van on the post that stands beside the pump – I guess sort of guarding it from potential damage, like what I would have done if it hadn’t been there. I heard the scraping and my heart sank as I knew that the van I was driving was only about two months old. The gas attendant (we used to have those) was a high school friend who tactfully said, “Whoa, Teresa, I thought you could drive?”

Let’s put this in better perspective – this was an eleven passenger van to accommodate the ten people in my family at that time. This was my parents’ new van and I had just scratched the entire side! I remember stopping by the river on the way home and trying to dab off some of the yellow paint to make it look better.

Then it was time to enter the driveway. I had to face my dad, and he was really, really mad! I knew because his face was a weird shade of purple. I cried and apologized, and I explained that the extra length was hard to turn around the pumps. I was beside myself.

My dad said very little – just agreed that it was an accident. His new van, his family mover, one of only four new vehicles that he owned in his lifetime, was totally messed up – but he knew it was not intended, he knew that I was remorseful and he left it at that. But, you know what else he did? He never got it fixed. I had to face those scratches, over and over, for like 10 years.

One year ago today, my dad died and I think of this – and a million other stories about him – and I miss him. We all know people, know pain, know joy, know challenge and triumph. I guess, like my dad decided to do, we should let the scratches show and remember the messed up bits along with the great stuff. It’s all part of life, after all, covered in paint and stretched out… And underneath the scratches we are really still there, those scratches making us who we are today.

Thanks for all you do, each day, scratchy and smooth.

From the desk of Teresa Jordan, Executive Director – I truly had one of Oprah’s “Aha moments” this past week. I love daffodils and on my drives from home to offices and in between there are countless gardens in full bloom – great wondrous clumps of yellow glory. So, for a few days, I would think about all of the small fortunes I have spent in my adult life trying to grow daffodils in my own gardens.

I remember distinctly when I was first married that I spent some of my precious little disposable income on a case of 50 daffodil bulbs, which I planted in the fall with great hope and watched patiently in the spring to see not even one come up! My neighbour thought maybe the squirrels ate them. I’m not sure what happened, but I know for sure that I am the common denominator because that was over twenty years ago and I have not yet successfully planted daffodils that bloomed in the spring.

So, I started to lay some plans as I saw these wonderful flowers last week in other people’s gardens – to try again, to remember to buy bulbs and to maybe research what I am doing wrong so that I can finally have the narcissistically fantastic display like all of these other homes on my route.

Then it happened – my “Aha.” I have been enjoying these displays of daffodils for days, as I see them regularly on my drives, but I have not actually spent time in my own yard to any great degree for three weeks. I do not need to own the beauty to enjoy it. I do not need to coral pretty flowers into my own yard, I do not need the grass to be greener in the space I call mine; I can just enjoy what is already all around me. I am already enjoying the flower beds on my drives and I am clearly quite deficient in growing ability. Maybe this applies to all kinds of things, but for sure I am resolute to enjoy beauty wherever I find it.

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Spring is here and maybe some would argue this, but it feels like summer. The trees are budding, the plants are popping and the birds are singing. Inside many houses grow tiny little plants that people started with the dream of planting outside.

My dad only got into this idea of starting seeds in the last few years with a grow lamp and his little green house. When I thought of any seeds I had tried to start indoors, I pictured the spindly little seedlings craning and reaching for light in my window sills and knowing that the minute I planted them outside a little breeze would probably snap them off.

Dad figured out, however, that the key is a grow lamp, down as close as can be tolerated so that the plants need not grow quickly and thinly to reach up for the nourishing light. With the light so close at hand they develop strong, resilient stocks and lush leaves right from the start. The trick here, though, is diligence – you must keep raising the lamp so that the hard stocky stems have room to grow, room to reach, space to become the potential that is hidden in their seed.

I recently read a great article about mentoring and sponsoring others. I am pretty sure that they just did not think of the metaphor here, but it is a perfect one. We need help close at hand until we don’t need that help any longer, but then we, again and again, need a new challenge or goal to reach for – that is life and that is gardening.
Thanks for all you do in spring and all the year through!